I don’t want a divorce


20142116_SDivorce can often happen in cases where one party does not want it.   In some cases, one party very much wants to save their marriage.  Maybe they didn’t see the divorce coming.  Maybe they saw it coming, but they are convinced it is a marriage that can be saved.

The question regardless of the situation is what is a party to do?  Do they consent to the divorce because their spouse doesn’t want to remain married?  Do they contest the divorce itself and either hope that the judge denies the divorce or that their spouse has a change of heart?

This is a complex question that is going to be based on the facts and the desires of any party.  On one hand, if the court finds that a marriage is not irretrievably broken, and there is no misconduct or cause, in many states, a judge has the authority to deny the divorce.  On the other hand, in this day and age, it is a fairly rare occurrence for a judge to deny a divorce where one party desperately wants it.  This is especially true where the parties are not engaging in sexual relations, are separated and not acting as husband and wife.

At the end of the day, one has to carefully consider their desire to save the marriage versus the desire of the other party to end it.  In some cases, absence can make the heart grow fonder.  Thus, if the party who doesn’t want the divorce gives their spouse some space and time,  there are cases where parties have a change of heart or decide that counseling might work.

But in cases where that doesn’t happen, is it wise to contest the divorce and ask a judge to make a determination at trial about whether the marriage will be dissolved or not?  In many cases, this is often an undesirable solution because a contested hearing (where allegations are aired in open court) is rarely a way to bring healing to a marriage.

However, if you would like to discuss your options, Stange Law Firm, PC can help.  We have contested divorce attorneys in Missouri and Illinois that can help.

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